Today was a big day for me. I started getting sick and was home with the boys. I always wondered how mom's stayed home when they were sick, now I know. Luckily Skye could figure out that I wasn't feeling well at all and really tried to keep it together. Both boys also decided to take monster naps this afternoon, so I got some real down time.
Skye is finally realizing that
a) Forrest is a baby
b) Forrest is his brother.
He'll find Akbar whenever Forrest starts to get upset and bring him to Forrest. He tries to be nice when Forrest is whacking him in the head. I think he realizes that he's not trying to hurt him b/c he sees Bug clocking me in the head as well. Today though was the sweetest. As the boys were getting ready to take their bath Skye leaned over and gave Forrest a kiss. It was so sweet. Later in the bath Forrest leaned over and gave Skye a kiss. They are really getting super sweet.
Forrest is seriously starting to walk. He cruised across the living room today, and is starting to walk before he gives in and crawls. Soon he'll be a cute little toddler dude.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
vacation #1
So far so good. We are at our family's cabin (well house really) at Black Butte Ranch. Both boys are asleep and Chris and Grandma are reading. We've been here for almost 3 days and Skye has done great. We've had our moments, but for the most part he's as relaxed here as he is at home. We've gone to the pool every day, which is a hoot. I don't think he's ever been in a pool, and freaks out at first and then splashes around. There is this little innertube that I taught him how to float in, and he's pretty comfortable in the water. Unfortunately Forrest has not been able to show off his swimming skills as he's had a snotty cold and the water is too cold. Cold enough that I have to dive off the end to actually get into the pool with Skye. Luckily I still have some extra insulation from carrying Forrest to keep me warm!
There are some things going on with Skye that continue to concern me. I have a deep seeded fear that he was abused in one of the foster homes. I'm not going to go into great detail, but there have been a few things that make me feel like my suspicions are true. There are some fixations that are not developmentally "normal" in a 2 year old, and some actions (and reactions) that aren't "normal" as well. I'll chat with our social worker about it and move on from there. What I will say is that we can get through this as well, and I'm angry. Angry that it took so long to get this little guy here and find out that someone hurt him. It's not fair and it's not right. We got an email from a previous foster family last week and I got pretty steamed. They delivered this little boy so dirty that it took Chris 3 or 4 washes to get the grease out of his hair, smelly nasty clothes, no toys (not even the ones that we'd sent down 6 weeks prior for his birthday) and no extra clothes. This is not how you treat a little boy. I know my job is to move through my anger, and I work on it daily. But when your son is showing signs of abuse, it retriggers it all over again...sigh
Oh and to add to the insanity of our adoption journey (Jennifer you are going to LOVE this!), I get an email from my agency letting me know that they neglected to make copies of the documents for our dossier before they sent it down to Guatemala, and did we happen to have copies so they can close out our file. I'm sorry, what?! Isn't that one of the main things that your adoption agency is supposed to keep track of? All I can say is thank the Lord nothing was lost or damaged in Guatemala or we would have had a HUGE issue. I have copies, somewhere. It made me laugh, in a sad twisted sort of way. I am so grateful that we are done with this process and can just move forward and love on our son.
Forrest is getting very close to walking. He took a few more steps in the kitchen, and then fell down on his booty. He's so funny because he just doesn't care if he walks or not. He can get from point a to point b crawling just fine. I think though once he starts to walk, it's running in a week. That's just kinda how he does things. It will also give him a fighting chance when Skye does mean things to him. Frankly I worry for Skye when Forrest is really able to defend himself. Forrest is going to be so much larger than his "big" brother. We took him in for his 1 year check up, and he's still in the 93rd percentile in height. Weight and head size are much lower, so he's going to be tall and skinny. The one really nice thing about the doctor's visit was Joe telling us how confident Forrest is. That he's unusually confident for a 1 year old. It made me feel good as a mom, that we are doing the right thing for our son to bring him up in the world. As much as I love and squeeze on him, it's also so important to me to help him learn who he is as a person - all in due time of course. He has become such a calm mellow little guy. Yes he screams with gusto when he's frustrated, but he's just as easily and quickly redirected and back to laughing. Joe (our md) also commented on how different Skye is. That he seems so much calmer and confident as well. It felt good to have someone who sees kids all day long really reinforce all the work we are doing. I feel proud when I look at my 2 boys and see such sweetness in them.
Being a mom is pretty dang cool I have to say. I don't think I'll have more than these 2, but they are enough to fill my life with such joy and love. It's pretty dang amazing.
There are some things going on with Skye that continue to concern me. I have a deep seeded fear that he was abused in one of the foster homes. I'm not going to go into great detail, but there have been a few things that make me feel like my suspicions are true. There are some fixations that are not developmentally "normal" in a 2 year old, and some actions (and reactions) that aren't "normal" as well. I'll chat with our social worker about it and move on from there. What I will say is that we can get through this as well, and I'm angry. Angry that it took so long to get this little guy here and find out that someone hurt him. It's not fair and it's not right. We got an email from a previous foster family last week and I got pretty steamed. They delivered this little boy so dirty that it took Chris 3 or 4 washes to get the grease out of his hair, smelly nasty clothes, no toys (not even the ones that we'd sent down 6 weeks prior for his birthday) and no extra clothes. This is not how you treat a little boy. I know my job is to move through my anger, and I work on it daily. But when your son is showing signs of abuse, it retriggers it all over again...sigh
Oh and to add to the insanity of our adoption journey (Jennifer you are going to LOVE this!), I get an email from my agency letting me know that they neglected to make copies of the documents for our dossier before they sent it down to Guatemala, and did we happen to have copies so they can close out our file. I'm sorry, what?! Isn't that one of the main things that your adoption agency is supposed to keep track of? All I can say is thank the Lord nothing was lost or damaged in Guatemala or we would have had a HUGE issue. I have copies, somewhere. It made me laugh, in a sad twisted sort of way. I am so grateful that we are done with this process and can just move forward and love on our son.
Forrest is getting very close to walking. He took a few more steps in the kitchen, and then fell down on his booty. He's so funny because he just doesn't care if he walks or not. He can get from point a to point b crawling just fine. I think though once he starts to walk, it's running in a week. That's just kinda how he does things. It will also give him a fighting chance when Skye does mean things to him. Frankly I worry for Skye when Forrest is really able to defend himself. Forrest is going to be so much larger than his "big" brother. We took him in for his 1 year check up, and he's still in the 93rd percentile in height. Weight and head size are much lower, so he's going to be tall and skinny. The one really nice thing about the doctor's visit was Joe telling us how confident Forrest is. That he's unusually confident for a 1 year old. It made me feel good as a mom, that we are doing the right thing for our son to bring him up in the world. As much as I love and squeeze on him, it's also so important to me to help him learn who he is as a person - all in due time of course. He has become such a calm mellow little guy. Yes he screams with gusto when he's frustrated, but he's just as easily and quickly redirected and back to laughing. Joe (our md) also commented on how different Skye is. That he seems so much calmer and confident as well. It felt good to have someone who sees kids all day long really reinforce all the work we are doing. I feel proud when I look at my 2 boys and see such sweetness in them.
Being a mom is pretty dang cool I have to say. I don't think I'll have more than these 2, but they are enough to fill my life with such joy and love. It's pretty dang amazing.
Friday, October 9, 2009
where's the camera when you need it?
Forrest is asleep for his morning nap and Skye is cracking me up. He's wearing his pj's, socks on his hands (his current fashion statement), and is dancing to the silly music thingy with the big bunny. I tell you, he's a funny little boy! Dinner last night was a crack up. He was being totally goofy and making me laugh and laugh. He's changed so much.
Okay found the camera - dead battery! Oh well...off to watch sesame street!
Okay found the camera - dead battery! Oh well...off to watch sesame street!
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Forrest is 1
Just a quick update, as things have been a bit funny lately. Forrest turned 1 on Sunday. I can't believe he's an entire year old. Still not walking, but so close. Just needs the confidence to do so. I cut my finger at the end of the day on Sunday. Hoping this isn't the start of a lovely plan to get a scar every year on Forrest's birthdaty - or spend any time in the ER! Can't belive I beat both my sons into the er. Luckily I was only there for 40 minutes, and got 3 stitches. Heres a little photo of me as I returned from the hospital - and yes I drove myself there and back....someone had to stay home and do bedtimes1!
Okay Forrest is running, well crawling through the house and finding all sorts of stuff to get into that isn't good - like I think the garbage bags...gotta run! Will post birthday photos at some point soon!
Okay Forrest is running, well crawling through the house and finding all sorts of stuff to get into that isn't good - like I think the garbage bags...gotta run! Will post birthday photos at some point soon!
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